July 21st, 2012 by Busy Mommy

Nolan is very affectionate and has no concept whatsoever of what we call that “personal bubble”.  I love hugging and kissing Nolan, so I do it all the time…..so I guess it’s only natural that Nolan would sidle up to other people and get cozy.

Nolan and Mia were being so good at the meeting the other night, looking at his little Bible and Bible story book together.  We won’t mention the part about Nolan trying to kiss her multiple times.  Oh yeah, I have to mention it because it goes with the point of this story.

When I told a friend about Nolan’s advances she laughed and said “he’s a lover” and mentioned a few other very affectionate outgoing children in her congregation who had these same qualities.  This came up because I’ve been trying to teach Nolan how to give “space” to others, and what it means to be a good friend- trying to go along with what the other person wants and respecting his/her wishes.

I told him that mommy loves to gets tons of kisses and hugs from him, but not everyone is like me and that some people like to have more space.  So we had a practice session of sorts on our way to see another little boy.

Mommy: “So Nolan, if you want to show (we’ll call him Bob) Bob something, should you grab him and pull him over there, or should you say, ‘bob, do you want to come see this?'”

Nolan in an exclamatory way: “I should say ‘bob do you want to come see this!”

Mommy: “yeah!  Now what should you do if he says no?  Should you grab him anyway and make him come, or should you say, ‘that’s okay bob.'”

Nolan: “I should say ‘that’s okay bob!'”

Mommy: “good job!”

I think it actually helped because he really did quite well with not being overly forceful with his own ideas on our little playdate that day.